Grapes

I dreamed I was trying to re-attach a grape to the cluster. Failure followed failure and I was growing frustrated.

For one reason or another people like grapes fall away from the cluster. Sometimes it’s for the good reason that the cluster is going bad, but there can many other reasons as well. Efforts to restore a friend or family member can be a painful and frustrating process especially when the person falls away for bad reasons. Even when the reason is good it hurts to lose those we care about.

Most of us have detached our selves from something or someone so if we reflect on our reasons for leaving we have a better sense why it’s happening. Some of my reasons have been valid and others not so perfect.

In college I dated a very nice, very attractive girl for a short period but I quit seeing her because she had no sense of humor. I quit dating another girl because I felt her drinking was getting out of control.

I quit two jobs when I was young  because they didn’t seem to fit for reasons I couldn’t put my finger on.

I quit Boy Scouts because I out grew it. I quit Rotary for several reasons but one of them was there was a person there I just didn’t want to deal with any longer.

I have no desire to be restored to any of these people or organizations and efforts to bring me back will be met with resistance.

Re-attaching grapes may be more impossible than restoring people but it serves as a teaching note. The loss can be painful and efforts to restore sometimes work but logic seldom restores what emotions have separated. If we deal with the emotional issues and realize emotions are real and powerful we improve our chances of success.

There are times when we simply have to let go of a relationship and move on. It’s rarely accomplished without great pain and the words “What could I have done differently.” Yet if we live in the past we don’t heal and we die with open wounds rather than the scars of life.

I’m sorry this isn’t a pleasant message. It isn’t delivered without trepidation because I know the pains some are dealing with are far beyond anything I’ve ever experienced. So much so who am I to speak of it at all.